You don’t take care of yourself.
I think this is the most heartbreaking because many women are mislead to believe that being low maintenance makes them more desirable to men. What it translates to is apathy towards yourself.
And gosh does it attract broke men and even worse, cheap men. There are very real metaphysical dynamics at play in relationships, but the type of man you want has a strong sense of responsibility and takes pride in being a man that can provide. Men like their women to reflect their ability to provide. Only lazy men are attracted to women who don’t put themselves first.
Nothing repels broke/undesirable men faster than a woman who takes impeccable care of herself because he know he can’t maintain that. That’s a GREAT consequence of taking care of yourself. If you find yourself being mistreated by men and wondering “I don’t understand I’m pretty and I always end up with dogs”, it’s because you aren’t taking care of yourself the way you should. And it’s not just physical, it’s emotional and it goes back to knowing what you want and need. Hell do you know your love language girl? Are you making sure you are getting it?!
Women who take care of themselves have a high sense of self preservation. They put themselves first always and believe any man in their life should put them first too. At any point it stops feeling good or they don’t feel like their needs are being met, they move on. Anytime they recognize their current reality isn’t in alignment with what they want they move on. It’s simple really, it’s up to you to make sure you are getting the care you need, all the time. Not just when he is feeling up to it.
We complicate things with toxic hope + romantic notions. Sometimes it really is simple: if they can’t show up for you and the behaviors they display are unhealthy & detrimental to your well being don’t create a space for them in your life. Access denied
— Danielle ✨🌑🌞 (@starsmoonandsun) May 19, 2020
Comments
Konnie
Great article with ‘real talk’ facts! Thank you for writing this.
Daniesha Johnson
I enjoyed reading this!
Marita
I’m glad you enjoyed it Daniesha! Be sure to sign up for updates!
Nonkululeko
One of the best articles I have read in a long time. I am truly in awe at such a sound, and articulate piece you have decided to share. I have decided to work fully on myself. Self love is a full time job ,from now on I will work on things people can’t take away from me, that is my character and personality.
Marita
I’m am happy it resonated! I truly believe it starts with getting clear on what you want and not compromising our big picture. I recommend snagging a few of the books I mentioned to help you on your journey!
Taylor
Look #4 hurt me to the core and I’ve been sitting on this one for awhile. I’ve always been okay with most of my close friend group being single (and the ones that aren’t being with men that don’t fit my personal standards) but as I’ve gotten older, I now understand how harmful that is to me and my journey. I like your book recommendations but how would you recommend finding/expanding to more like-minded friend groups as an adult?
Marita
It happens and a lot of times we don’t think about it. But it’s true, just like with most things, if you want something for yourself you need to get around people who have what you want. Surround yourself with likeminded people or people that can help you attract what you want. I’m not sure if there is a book that you need to read to know that you may want to expand your network of friends.
Taylor
My question is how do I expand my network to gain like-minded close friendships? I’ve found as an adult it gets harder to do.
Susanna Willetts
immaculate article
recep ivedik
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